Midnight Oil

[I had the post below drafted 2 weeks ago, before I went down with a bug and infection (yuck). I thought twice about posting this, but I couldn’t help it, sorry. But hey, anyhow, welcome to my blog! This chronicles scrappy thoughts, writing inspirations, updates, heart (or lack of it). I’ll try my best to make this as interesting as possible and more for everyone’s good. Feel free to comment and share, friends. Xo]

Under a dark cloud, I had allowed myself to be in the past few weeks. Who doesn’t wallow once in a while? I deem it’s the healthiest and irrefutable truism one can recognize in oneself. Shadowing depression usually was self-doubt. When one questions its place in this world, one tends to fold in itself. No matter the reminder of open-minded and kind purpose, sometimes one allows to be in a trance – floating by and about with its confidence slowly seemingly awash as well. One can only be human.

But I can only be weak so much. These womanly hormones, man they really get to you bad. It took a long conversation with a friend about future career or business plans for me to realize what it was I truly want to pursue. After a two-week hiatus from my first novel, thank God, I have renewed hunger to finish what I started. I had so much momentum in the beginning and the editing stage had me literally staring unto my laptop for hours with zero output.

My content editor advised for me to get out of the minds of a couple of my sub characters (rookie mistake tendencies, of course, on top of so many). This had been a large undertaking that had me thinking, rethinking and then calling it quits. This meant that I have to redo so many chapters all throughout the novel. I now have a few solutions in mind. The key word was “few”. More tinkering is to be done.

I have to remember that my editor thought that my protagonists were very strong. They held their own. I can add more dimension if I’d like, but she thought I did them pretty well. She also felt really good about the “theme” of my story. I won’t quote her though this time – I’m not about to give spoilers.

Like what I told my friend, so what, if this doesn’t pan out well? I can only charge this to my very own experience and education in creative writing. If this does turn out really well, it would be so fantastic! If not, then I am jumping onto my next one.

When is it ever wrong to follow your well-meaning life passion?

Indeed, it’s time yet again to light my wick up.